Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 5

**Spoilers**

If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.

"My youngest sister has left all her friends, has eloped, and has thrown herself into the power of Mr. Wickham."

To a modern audience, Lydia's infamous elopement and the havoc it causes might seem a bit melodramatic. People live with each other before getting married all the time now. It's no big deal in the eyes of society. However, we must take ourselves back to another time period where this was very much a big deal. Virtue in a woman was irretrievable and if one sister from a family had behaved indiscreetly, it usually meant that the others were all considered tainted by association. This may not seem fair, but that was the way it was. 

Lizzie spends the episode getting to know the Darcy family better, and seeing that Darcy is quite a different creature at home with his sister and friends. Georgiana Darcy is not proud and full of herself at all. Instead she is almost painfully shy. Lizzie sets about drawing the girl out and encouraging her in a way that she never had to the chance to do for her younger sisters. Mr. Darcy is not oblivious to this and the two of them share smoldering looks over Miss Bingley's head. I think one of my favorite moments of all is whenever Caroline Bingley tries to abuse her rival to Mr. Darcy and he snaps back at her that it has been many months since he has considered Elizabeth the most handsome woman of his acquaintance. That was quite satisfying.

Mrs. Bennet was the highlight of this episode. The actress described the role as like looking at a big vat of chocolate that you just couldn't wait to dive into, and it's obvious that she was having the time of her life. Mrs. Bennet is taken ill with the hysterics and proceeds to weep and wail and require smelling salts, all while demanding that Lydia consult her about wedding clothes before anything else. I'm quite sure that Mr. Bennet was slightly grateful to get out of the house and go to London to search for Lydia.

One thing I really love about this episode are the additions. Just as Mrs. Bennet groans out about her "...poor, poor Lydia!" the episode cuts to Lydia sitting idly by a window in London, bored and lazy but decidedly not miserable. The added scenes with Lydia and Wickham help to enhance the story a lot and it is interesting that we are clearly shown how Wickham has already tired of the silly girl. 

Mr. Darcy becoming a white knight in shining armor and riding to Lizzie's sister's defense was a great part of the episode too (really, there are no bad parts) as he doesn't really think anything will come of it. He isn't doing this for his own benefit. He is quite sure that Elizabeth will never accept his proposal and that he is doomed to forever admire her from afar. He does it because he wants to help. That is the biggest change in his character of all and it is what will eventually turn Lizzie's heart around.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 4

**Spoilers**

If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.

  "Be not alarmed, madam, on receiving this letter, by the apprehension of its containing any repetition of those sentiments or renewal of those offers which were last night so disgusting to you."

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but when Mr. Darcy is scorned he goes back home to write a long, involved, and incredibly soul-baring (not to mention brutally honest) letter. Through the words of the letter, we are given an important glimpse into Mr. Wickham's past that reveals just what a cad he is and how narrow an escape Lizzie had. It also starts to cast everything that we have seen in the series thus far in a totally different light. Suddenly all of Wickham's actions and insinuations start to make all too much sense.

We also get a rather painful outsider's look at the Bennet family as Lizzie has to concede Darcy's point about her mother, sisters (minus Jane), and even her father having a tendency to make spectacles of themselves. It is here that we begin to see the other side of Mr. Darcy and, while we'll never empathize with his rather extreme pride, we do begin to see the man behind the mask.

Also in this episode, Lydia takes off for Brighton with the militia (showing us just how spoiled she is in the process) and Lizzie meets up with her aunt and uncle Gardner (the ones Jane had stayed with in London) to take a tour of Derbyshire...including a visit to Pemberly, Mr. Darcy's estate. But only with the promise that the family is not at home. Little does Elizabeth know that Darcy, still in agony over his unrequited love, has rode ahead of his party of friends and is taking a refreshing swim in one of the ponds. The meeting between Lizzie and Mr. Darcy at Pemberly is another highlight of the series. It's just so painfully awkward and yet it gives Darcy hope because he is completely vulnerable, completely caught at an undignified moment, and is granted a chance to show Lizzie a more hospitable, gracious side of himself. He doesn't expect to win her back, but he does try to at least show her some courtesy. One thing that catches Lizzie's eye is the fact that he is all kindness and genuine graciousness to her relatives...the ones that she KNOWS that he knows are not gentlefolk and reside in Cheapside. Lizzie cannot imagine what has caused this change. Her aunt (who is a delightful and wise woman) smiles knowingly.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 3

**Spoilers**

If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.

         "In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you." 

       

So Charlotte Lucas snagged Mr. Collins on the rebound, Wickham has set his sights on a rich young heiress, and Mr. Darcy finally can't take it any longer and gives Lizzie a very flustered and utterly insulting proposal. Poor Lizzie!

Well, actually I don't feel too sorry for her. She gives as good as she's got and royally dresses him down for being such a jerk. He had it coming...

That is the climax of the episode (and, I daresay, of the entire series). There's LOTS more that happens. For starters, we have the beginning of the rift between Jane and Miss Bingley. We've long seen that Caroline is a catty, rich snob who only tolerated Jane's company because it was the best to be had in Hertfordshire (aside from Louisa's belching, drunk husband, that is) but Jane was determined not to think the worst of the sister of her prospective husband. In this episode, Miss Bingley comes to visit Jane in London where she is (oh horrors) staying in Cheapside with her aunt and uncle. The uncle who is in (gasp) trade of all things!

Lizzie then travels with Sir William Lucas and his youngest daughter, Mariah, to visit the new Mrs. Collins in Kent. This also gives them an opportunity to meet up with the esteemed patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh. I am very glad that Mariah Lucas was included in this adaptation, as she is a fun character who - for some reason - is often cut. She gives Lizzie the chance to be the big sister to someone actually agreeable. Unlike Lady Catherine and her daughter, who are exceedingly unpleasant and rude. But, because they are rich, they can afford to be.

But all of this, including the introduction of Colonel Fitzwilliam, is all building up to the big reveal and proposal of Mr. Darcy and Lizzie's subsequent refusal. It is the highlight of the episode. No questions asked.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 2

**Spoilers**

If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.

     "And you should take it into further consideration, that in spite of your manifold attractions, it is by no means certain that another offer of marriage may ever be made you."    

   

What a charmer...

David Bamber is the quintessential Mr. Collins. Nobody before him so perfectly managed to capture the mix of arrogance and self-abasement that this character ascribes to and now that he has played the role, nobody else can even compete.

In this episode, Mr. Bennet's cousin (the aforementioned Mr. Collins) arrives for a visit. He is the man guilty of the truly heinous crime of being the relative to which the estate of Longbourn is entailed, and so he has decided to make amends by marrying one of the Bennet girls. He's not particular as to which one. After finding out that Jane is already taken, he just continues on down the line and latches on Lizzie. Lucky girl...

Mr. Collins is really the highlight of this episode, particularly in the way that Bamber plays off of all the other actors. He gives us a toadying, bumbling, self-centered, patronizing clergyman who is utterly obsessed with his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh and who has almost no original thought outside of what she has told him. I would not want to sit under his sermons, let me tell you!

There is competition for the affections of Elizabeth Bennet, though, as no sooner does Mr. Collins arrive on the scene then a dashing young officer named George Wickham also comes to town. Wickham is a charming cad, a romantic rogue, a simpering, smirking, handsome, conniving man who wastes no time in weaseling his way into Lizzie's affections by detecting and exploiting her willful feud with Mr. Darcy. In these early episodes (particularly if you haven't seen/read the story before) Wickham seems the very picture of wronged goodness. He seems like the everyman hero who is put down and crushed by life and yet pulls himself up by the bootstraps every time. Mr. Collins is utterly blown out of the water. He cannot compete with Wickham in Lizzie's eyes, though he certainly tries.

Really the climax of the episode comes with the Netherfield ball where Darcy finally gives in to his feelings and asks Elizabeth to dance in quite possibly the best scene of the entire miniseries.

Then the day after the ball, Mr. Collins (doubtlessly feeling the pressure from both Wickham and Darcy) proposes to her in a scene that is as uncomfortable and infuriating as it is hilarious. He manages to insult pretty much everything about her and then has the audacity to let her know that he is proposing, not because he loves her, but because Lady Catherine de Bourgh feels that he should find a wife. Then, when Lizzie turns him down, he smirks at her and assumes that she is merely playing coy and hard to get in order to further inflame his 'love' for her. Pardon me while I gag.

The episode ends with Lizzie's father staunchly refusing to make her marry Mr. Collins and Charlotte Lucas (Lizzie's best friend) swooping in to save the day by inviting the spurned lover to dine with her family.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 1

**Spoilers**

If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.

"It is a truth, universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife."

This 1995 miniseries by BBC is, in my humble opinion, the best adaptation of Jane Austen's famous novel ever to be filmed. It sparkles with wit and charm and beautifully enhances the source material while also preserving the original draw of the book. It is a prime example of a book-to-film adaptation done right.

The first episode tells us of the arrival of Mr. Bingley at Netherfield Park and the flutter that this puts the Merryton society into. It is within this episode that the groundwork for pretty much all of the characters and relationships throughout the series is established. I particularly like the opening scene where the members of the Bennet family are introduced. There's very little dialogue, but through the music and some clever placings of the characters, all of the clashing personalities of this family are clearly seen and set in place. Mr. Bennet is a reclusive bookworm who spends much of his time hiding in the library and making sarcastic digs at everyone. Elizabeth (or Lizzie) is his favorite daughter and shares much of his wit and observations on life. Jane is the oldest daughter and the calming pillar of her family. Mary is plain and deadpan and more interested in her moralizing books than anything else. Kitty and Lydia are still nearly children and fight as often as they conspire together, often driving the anxious and hysterical Mrs. Bennet to distraction with their carryings on. Mrs. Bennet herself tends to favor Lydia over everyone.

Then we are introduced to the arrival of Mr. Bingley and to Mrs. Bennet trying to make plans and play her cards right in order to make a match between one of her daughters and this rich bachelor. While, from a modern standpoint, we may look back and be horrified at this culture of matchmaking and marrying like you're buying an insurance policy and looking for the best offer, really that was what happened. It was all about making a good alliance and about climbing the social ladder. And, as Lizzie and Jane observe, really a woman had little other options for security if she was not an heiress to an estate herself. The Bennet Estate of Longbourn is entailed (which means it can only pass down to a male heir) and so all of the Bennet girls must make a good choice of husband and marry for money.

Lizzie, though, is determined that nothing but the very deepest of love will induce her to matrimony. She and Jane have seen and observed daily through their parents what happens when one or both partners can't respect their spouse, and so the girls are determined not to let this happen to them. Lizzie tells Jane to marry for love but "...just take care you fall in love with a rich man."

Luckily for Jane, it's not long before she catches the eye of Mr. Bingley (the rich bachelor who has just moved into the local park) and the two of them begin to fall in love. Lizzie too has caught the eye of a rich young man. Mr. Darcy is Mr. Bingley's best friend and has an estate worth twice what Bingley's is (as Mrs. Bennet gleefully and loudly tells her daughters). Lizzie has an ill first impression of him, though, as the first time they meet he rather stiffly tells Bingley that Elizabeth's appearance is tolerable, at best, and that he is in no mood to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. Needless to say, Lizzie determines that Mr. Darcy is the worst sort of proud and disagreeable and swears that she will never even stand up to dance with him.

Already within this episode the tensions between the characters are already set in place. Lizzie hates Darcy. Darcy, despite himself, is beginning to notice Lizzie because she is the first woman not to throw herself at him. Jane and Bingley are falling in love, but Bingley's friends and family don't like Jane's connections and relatives...due in a large part to Mrs. Bennet's abysmal manners. We've learned that, for gentlefolk, the Bennets are poor and that Mr. and Mrs. Bennet do little to appreciate each other or to curb the behavior of their children. We've learned that the girls must make a good match. And there's been a lot of dialogue with so many good quotes that I could spend an entire review just listing them all.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 4

**Spoilers**
If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.


  "Be not alarmed, madam, on receiving this letter, by the apprehension of its containing any repetition of those sentiments or renewal of those offers which were last night so disgusting to you."


           Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...but when Mr. Darcy is scorned he goes back home to write a long, involved, and incredibly soul-baring (not to mention brutally honest) letter. Through the words of the letter, we are given an important glimpse into Mr. Wickham's past that reveals just what a cad he is and how narrow an escape Lizzie had. It also starts to cast everything that we have seen in the series thus far in a totally different light. Suddenly all of Wickham's actions and insinuations start to make all too much sense.

         We also get a rather painful outsider's look at the Bennet family as Lizzie has to concede Darcy's point about her mother, sisters (minus Jane), and even her father having a tendency to make spectacles of themselves. It is here that we begin to see the other side of Mr. Darcy and, while we'll never empathize with his rather extreme pride, we do begin to see the man behind the mask.

        Also in this episode, Lydia takes off for Brighton with the militia (showing us just how spoiled she is in the process) and Lizzie meets up with her aunt and uncle Gardner (the ones Jane had stayed with in London) to take a tour of Derbyshire...including a visit to Pemberly, Mr. Darcy's estate. But only with the promise that the family is not at home. Little does Elizabeth know that Darcy, still in agony over his unrequited love, has rode ahead of his party of friends and is taking a refreshing swim in one of the ponds. The meeting between Lizzie and Mr. Darcy at Pemberly is another highlight of the series. It's just so painfully awkward and yet it gives Darcy hope because he is completely vulnerable, completely caught at an undignified moment, and is granted a chance to show Lizzie a more hospitable, gracious side of himself. He doesn't expect to win her back, but he does try to at least show her some courtesy. One thing that catches Lizzie's eye is the fact that he is all kindness and genuine graciousness to her relatives...the ones that she KNOWS that he knows are not gentlefolk and reside in Cheapside. Lizzie cannot imagine what has caused this change. Her aunt (who is a delightful and wise woman) smiles knowingly.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 3

**Spoilers**
If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.


         "In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you." 
       

           So Charlotte Lucas snagged Mr. Collins on the rebound, Wickham has set his sights on a rich young heiress, and Mr. Darcy finally can't take it any longer and gives Lizzie a very flustered and utterly insulting proposal. Poor Lizzie!

         Well, actually I don't feel too sorry for her. She gives as good as she's got and royally dresses him down for being such a jerk. He had it coming...

          That is the climax of the episode (and, I daresay, of the entire series). There's LOTS more that happens. For starters, we have the beginning of the rift between Jane and Miss Bingley. We've long seen that Caroline is a catty, rich snob who only tolerated Jane's company because it was the best to be had in Hertfordshire (aside from Louisa's belching, drunk husband, that is) but Jane was determined not to think the worst of the sister of her prospective husband. In this episode, Miss Bingley comes to visit Jane in London where she is (oh horrors) staying in Cheapside with her aunt and uncle. The uncle who is in (gasp) trade of all things!

       Lizzie then travels with Sir William Lucas and his youngest daughter, Mariah, to visit the new Mrs. Collins in Kent. This also gives them an opportunity to meet up with the esteemed patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh. I am very glad that Mariah Lucas was included in this adaptation, as she is a fun character who - for some reason - is often cut. She gives Lizzie the chance to be the big sister to someone actually agreeable. Unlike Lady Catherine and her daughter, who are exceedingly unpleasant and rude. But, because they are rich, they can afford to be.

      But all of this, including the introduction of Colonel Fitzwilliam, is all building up to the big reveal and proposal of Mr. Darcy and Lizzie's subsequent refusal. It is the highlight of the episode. No questions asked.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 2

**Spoilers**
If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.


     "And you should take it into further consideration, that in spite of your manifold attractions, it is by no means certain that another offer of marriage may ever be made you."    

   
      What a charmer...

     David Bamber is the quintessential Mr. Collins. Nobody before him so perfectly managed to capture the mix of arrogance and self-abasement that this character ascribes to and now that he has played the role, nobody else can even compete.

      In this episode, Mr. Bennet's cousin (the aforementioned Mr. Collins) arrives for a visit. He is the man guilty of the truly heinous crime of being the relative to which the estate of Longbourn is entailed, and so he has decided to make amends by marrying one of the Bennet girls. He's not particular as to which one. After finding out that Jane is already taken, he just continues on down the line and latches on Lizzie. Lucky girl...

      Mr. Collins is really the highlight of this episode, particularly in the way that Bamber plays off of all the other actors. He gives us a toadying, bumbling, self-centered, patronizing clergyman who is utterly obsessed with his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh and who has almost no original thought outside of what she has told him. I would not want to sit under his sermons, let me tell you!

     There is competition for the affections of Elizabeth Bennet, though, as no sooner does Mr. Collins arrive on the scene then a dashing young officer named George Wickham also comes to town. Wickham is a charming cad, a romantic rogue, a simpering, smirking, handsome, conniving man who wastes no time in weaseling his way into Lizzie's affections by detecting and exploiting her willful feud with Mr. Darcy. In these early episodes (particularly if you haven't seen/read the story before) Wickham seems the very picture of wronged goodness. He seems like the everyman hero who is put down and crushed by life and yet pulls himself up by the bootstraps every time. Mr. Collins is utterly blown out of the water. He cannot compete with Wickham in Lizzie's eyes, though he certainly tries.

       Really the climax of the episode comes with the Netherfield ball where Darcy finally gives in to his feelings and asks Elizabeth to dance in quite possibly the best scene of the entire miniseries:

        Then the day after the ball, Mr. Collins (doubtlessly feeling the pressure from both Wickham and Darcy) proposes to her in a scene that is as uncomfortable and infuriating as it is hilarious. He manages to insult pretty much everything about her and then has the audacity to let her know that he is proposing, not because he loves her, but because Lady Catherine de Bourgh feels that he should find a wife. Then, when Lizzie turns him down, he smirks at her and assumes that she is merely playing coy and hard to get in order to further inflame his 'love' for her. Pardon me while I gag.

        The episode ends with Lizzie's father staunchly refusing to make her marry Mr. Collins and Charlotte Lucas (Lizzie's best friend) swooping in to save the day by inviting the spurned lover to dine with her family.

5/5

Pride & Prejudice Review: Episode 1

**Spoilers**
If you have not yet seen this episode, please go and do so before proceeding.

             "It is a truth, universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife."

      This 1995 miniseries by BBC is, in my humble opinion, the best adaptation of Jane Austen's famous novel ever to be filmed. It sparkles with wit and charm and beautifully enhances the source material while also preserving the original draw of the book. It is a prime example of a book-to-film adaptation done right.

      The first episode tells us of the arrival of Mr. Bingley at Netherfield Park and the flutter that this puts the Merryton society into. It is within this episode that the groundwork for pretty much all of the characters and relationships throughout the series is established. I particularly like the opening scene where the members of the Bennet family are introduced. There's very little dialogue, but through the music and some clever placings of the characters, all of the clashing personalities of this family are clearly seen and set in place. Mr. Bennet is a reclusive bookworm who spends much of his time hiding in the library and making sarcastic digs at everyone. Elizabeth (or Lizzie) is his favorite daughter and shares much of his wit and observations on life. Jane is the oldest daughter and the calming pillar of her family. Mary is plain and deadpan and more interested in her moralizing books than anything else. Kitty and Lydia are still nearly children and fight as often as they conspire together, often driving the anxious and hysterical Mrs. Bennet to distraction with their carryings on. Mrs. Bennet herself tends to favor Lydia over everyone.

      Then we are introduced to the arrival of Mr. Bingley and to Mrs. Bennet trying to make plans and play her cards right in order to make a match between one of her daughters and this rich bachelor. While, from a modern standpoint, we may look back and be horrified at this culture of matchmaking and marrying like you're buying an insurance policy and looking for the best offer, really that was what happened. It was all about making a good alliance and about climbing the social ladder. And, as Lizzie and Jane observe, really a woman had little other options for security if she was not an heiress to an estate herself. The Bennet Estate of Longbourn is entailed (which means it can only pass down to a male heir) and so all of the Bennet girls must make a good choice of husband and marry for money.

      Lizzie, though, is determined that nothing but the very deepest of love will induce her to matrimony. She and Jane have seen and observed daily through their parents what happens when one or both partners can't respect their spouse, and so the girls are determined not to let this happen to them. Lizzie tells Jane to marry for love but "...just take care you fall in love with a rich man."

       Luckily for Jane, it's not long before she catches the eye of Mr. Bingley (the rich bachelor who has just moved into the local park) and the two of them begin to fall in love. Lizzie too has caught the eye of a rich young man. Mr. Darcy is Mr. Bingley's best friend and has an estate worth twice what Bingley's is (as Mrs. Bennet gleefully and loudly tells her daughters). Lizzie has an ill first impression of him, though, as the first time they meet he rather stiffly tells Bingley that Elizabeth's appearance is tolerable, at best, and that he is in no mood to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. Needless to say, Lizzie determines that Mr. Darcy is the worst sort of proud and disagreeable and swears that she will never even stand up to dance with him.

       Already within this episode the tensions between the characters are already set in place. Lizzie hates Darcy. Darcy, despite himself, is beginning to notice Lizzie because she is the first woman not to throw herself at him. Jane and Bingley are falling in love, but Bingley's friends and family don't like Jane's connections and relatives...due in a large part to Mrs. Bennet's abysmal manners. We've learned that, for gentlefolk, the Bennets are poor and that Mr. and Mrs. Bennet do little to appreciate each other or to curb the behavior of their children. We've learned that the girls must make a good match. And there's been a lot of dialogue with so many good quotes that I could spend an entire review just listing them all.

5/5

Greatest Unsung Romances: Pride & Prejudice

          Sometimes, as I'm watching a movie or reading a book (or both), two characters simply jump out at me as the ones who should have ended up together. The two who should have ridden off into the metaphorical sunset together...either because their personalities were made for each other or because all of the other characters would have been better off had this pairing played out.

Mr. Collins/Mary - Pride & Prejudice 

             He really missed out on something when he overlooked the middle Bennet sister. Yes maybe she wasn't as pretty or outgoing as her sisters...but Mary was the determined brains of the family (meaning that she was determined to be the brains) and had a fondness for attempts at being profound and reading long, dry sermon compilations. She knew she was the plain one and that, among her beautiful siblings, she was the one most likely to end up an old maid and so Mary did the only thing she felt she could do - she fashioned a persona and mind for herself that focused more on the logical and intellectual than the flirtatious manner that Lydia subscribed to. Oh...and she totally had the hots for Mr. Collins.


          Yes Mr. Collins the obliviously socially awkward, toadying clergyman with a near unhealthy obsession about his patron. Mr. Collins the social climber and prime example of all that could possibly go wrong with the 'purchase your living' policy. Mr. Collins the immature and rather thick wannabe who considers himself quite the catch and a suave flatterer to boot. Mr. Collins who can't wipe his nose unless it is condoned and sponsored by the illustrious Lady Catherine de Bourgh.

           You know...I'm actually beginning to feel a bit sorry for poor Mary if that milksop was who she considered to be a fine candidate for a potential husband. Although, to be fair, she had to have noticed that he was probably her only candidate (much like Charlotte did) and that's what part of the appeal was, but still!

         If Mr. Collins had picked Mary, then he would have at least had a wife who would have looked up to him and not made fun of him behind his back (Not that I blame Charlotte!) and Lady Catherine would have loved her, seeing as how her 'plainness' would assure that dear Anne was still perceived as the loveliest young woman in the room. Mary would have been in too much awe of Lady Catherine to mouth off the way Lizzie did and she certainly would have been delighted to listen to Mr. Collins' attempts at being charismatic and eloquent.

       Would the match have actually worked? No. Probably not. If I'm honest with myself, then I have to say that no match involving Mr. Collins could ever actually work out with both parties completely happy. He wanted a trophy wife, not a life partner, and so (shallowly) would have eventually come to resent Mary for her plainness. He was just that kind of scumbag - incurable and completely narcissistic. From Mary's end, I think that once she had exhausted Mr. Collins' rather limited intellect she would have grown restless and discontented as well. Relationships never work whenever one or both participants are simply looking out for self-interest.

        Still...a girl can dream, right? If Mary had married Mr. Collins, Charlotte would have been freed, Mrs. Bennet wouldn't be fretting about 'those Lucases' getting their hands on Longbourne, Lizzie wouldn't be suffering through a slightly-damaged relationship with her best friend, and Lady Catherine wouldn't have a personal vendetta towards all things Bennet. (Of course Lizzie probably wouldn't end up with Darcy in that scenario either, given the fact that his disastrous proposal and her sharp dressing-down was the key ingredient in the change of their relationship, but that's a story for another time.)

         I know that changing one element of a story changes everything. But I just can't help myself; every time I watch Pride & Prejudice I can't help but think that Mary and Mr. Collins were made for each other. If nothing else they would have been happier together than he and Charlotte ever will be...!